Saturday, January 15, 2011

here's to being black

I have often been mistaken for a black man. I have also dressed up in women's clothing before. Maybe that's why I have been receiving a subscription to Essence magazine in the mail.

Somebody (no kidding!) signed me up for a subscription to Essence magazine. Either that or maybe it was some kind of thank you gift from a company for something I did or bought or taste-tested or smelled.

Essence, mind you, is a magazine whose target audience is

1. Black
2. Women

I am, mind you, ahem, a VERY white man. Read: Very hairy and practically albino, I'd say. And, yes, blue eyes. Er, Aryan. *cough*

I have a rap I sing from time to time that goes like this: "I'm extremely white; my buttocks is tight."

Yeah, uh huh. True dat.

And another: "My name is Troy, I'm from the inner city and I have all the jokes from A to Z."

That, much to Heather's dismay, is also abundantly true.

If one of you out there started sending me this magazine, would you kindly enlighten me?

Don't get me wrong: I'm actually enjoying it. The first magazine that came had a feature article on the new host of Family Feud. It was quite interesting, believe it or not. (The dude is much better than Richard Dawson ever was, by the way. Check out the show. It's funny again.) There was also another article that dealt with what black women want in a black man. I also found that interesting because it provided insights into the complexities of the African-American psyche. (Please know that I'm being serious now in this paragraph. No joking around.)

Because of this, I will either:

A. See if a friend would like the subscription as issues arrive in my mailbox.
B. Just keep the subscription and learn some more about my very dear black friends. (If you're reading this: love youse guys! Thanks for being my friend!)

I guess, either way, I could just call or write to find out how the heck I got this subscription in the first place.

At any rate: here's to being black. I'll gladly count myself as African American in honor of the upcoming Martin Luther King day--and even beyond if you all will have me.

No comments: