the Grace in my mess

do i appear to you

as one who

has it all together?

do i strike you

as one who

has it all figured out?

don’t let appearances

deceive you.

i have doubts and fears,

insecurity won’t seem

to leave me alone.

i have hurts

i like to nurse.

i envy and scrape

for fame.

i worry and obsess

over things i cannot control.

i have enemies i want to remain so.

i have an image i want to project

and i have pride i want to protect.

i have days when all i want is to be left alone

and other days when all i want is to be noticed.

confusion grips me.

i get anxious about work and family,

friends and retirement.

this is why i need Grace.

Grace is the strength i don’t have,

the peace that won’t leave.

Grace protects me

from myself.

Grace forgives me, heals me

and reveals to me

that nothing

absolutely nothing

can make God stop loving me,

caring for me,

guiding and abiding with me,

seeing me, singing over me,

dancing and inviting,

embracing and facing me.

Grace is the reason

when i’m irrational,

the season’s change

after a dark, strange winter.

Grace holds me together

when i’m falling apart.

Grace binds the wounds

that cut deep into my heart.

Grace introduces me

to my own humanity

and bids me make peace

with my own limitation.

do i seem to you

as one who

has it all together?

look deeper.

see the Grace

in all my mess.

……………

the Grace in my mess

by troy cady