I do not know why, at times, it feels like I can’t keep up with God while at other times it seems like I’m always running ahead of him.
I do not know why, at times, God is the one saying ‘Rest’ while at other times he says ‘Get up and get moving!’
It will always be a mystery to me:
God is both unknowable and my best friend.
He is here and everywhere else, too.
He is inside me and outside me.
He never changes yet he is always moving.
He has a plan for me yet he grants me freedom to choose.
He doesn’t need me yet he treats me as if he needs me.
He is abundant fullness yet eternally self-emptying.
These are all great mysteries to me, yet the greatest mystery is: he forgives me when I commit the same sin over and over and over again. He would have me be rid of sin entirely, but, until I am, he will never be rid of me. I am the adopted orphan, rags to riches, the nightmare that became a dream fulfilled.
Amazing love—how can it be?