Sometimes all you have is the memory of following one step at a time. You wonder how you got here. Step by step, that’s all you know. You hope your remembrance is accurate.
You are not perfect, but after an honest look at the past you can say you were following God with each step. Nothing in your mind prickles, no stifling disobedience, no willful hubris.
So why the doubt now? Why do you wonder “what if”? You scarcely knew the cost of such a decision, the many trajectories you turned down. Though you followed God’s leading step by step, you suddenly find yourself plagued with regret, wondering what would have happened had you taken a different path. But, listen:
Faith is proved genuine in its testing. After all, what good is faith if it is never challenged? Trust that faces no threat is not trust—it is just ease—because faith is not needed where there is no tension. These doubts you have define your faith so do not think your trust negated because of a few misgivings.
We need faith because our perspective is forever limited. Faith is the engine that drives you to God’s assurances; trust in the midst of the shadow of doubt inevitably leads to a hungry search to hear the voice of God through simple prayer and Scripture. So seek His face and never give up. He will make a way and show you the next step.